I dreamed I was missing, you were so scared
But no one would listen, ’cause no one else cared
After my dreaming, I woke with this fear
What am I leaving when I’m done here?
So, if you’re asking me, I want you to know
When my time comes, forget the wrong that I’ve done
Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed
And don’t resent me, and when you’re feeling empty
Keep me in your memory, leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest…
I’m tired of being what you want me to be
Feeling so faithless, lost under the surface
I don’t know what you’re expecting of me
Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
I’ve become so numb, I can’t feel you there
Become so tired, so much more aware
By becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you
Can’t you see that you’re smothering me?
Holding too tightly, afraid to lose control
‘Cause everything that you thought I would be
Has fallen apart right in front of you
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
And every second I waste is more than I can take!
I’ve become so numb, I can’t feel you there
Become so tired, so much more aware
By becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you
And I know I may end up failing too
But I know you were just like me
With someone disappointed in you
I’ve become so numb, I can’t feel you there
Become so tired, so much more aware
By becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you
Memories consume like opening the wounds
I’m picking me apart again
You all assume
I’m safe here in my room
Unless I try to start again
I don’t want to be the one the battles always choose
‘Cause inside I realize that I’m the one confused
I don’t know what’s worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
I don’t know why I instigate
And say what I don’t mean
I don’t know how I got this way
I know it’s not alright
So I’m breaking the habit
I’m breaking the habit tonight
Clutching my cure
I tightly lock the door
I try to catch my breath again
I hurt much more than any time before
I have no options left again
I don’t want to be the one the battles always choose
‘Cause inside I realize that I’m the one confused
I don’t know what’s worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
I don’t know why I instigate
And say what I don’t mean
I don’t know how I got this way
I’ll never be alright
So I’m breaking the habit
I’m breaking the habit tonight
I’ll paint it on the walls
‘Cause I’m the one at fault
I’ll never fight again
And this is how it ends
I don’t know what’s worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
But now I have some clarity to show you what I mean
I don’t know how I got this way
I’ll never be alright
So I’m breaking the habit
I’m breaking the habit
I’m breaking the habit tonight
I cannot take this anymore
Saying everything I’ve said before
All these words they make no sense
I find bliss in ignorance
Less I hear the less you say
You’ll find that out anyway
I find the answers aren’t so clear
Wish I could find a way to disappear
All these thoughts they make no sense
I find bliss in ignorance
Nothing seems to go away
Over and over again
Just like before…
Everything you say to me
Takes me one step closer to the edge
And I’m about to break
I need a little room to breathe
Cause I’m one step closer to the edge
I’m about to break
I will never know myself until I do this on my own
And I will never feel anything else until my wounds are healed
I will never be anything ’til I break away from me
And I will break away and find myself today
I want to heal, I want to feel
What I thought was never real
I want to let go of the pain I felt so long
I want to heal, I want to feel
Like I’m close to something real
I want to find something I’ve wanted all along
Somewhere I belong…
I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
R.I.P. Chester Bennington
Crawling in my skin
These wounds, they will not heal
Fear is how I fall
Confusing what is real
Discomfort endlessly has pulled itself upon me
Distracting, reacting
Against my will I stand beside my own reflection
It’s haunting how I can’t seem
To find myself again
My walls are closing in
Without a sense of confidence I’m convinced
That there’s just too much pressure to take
I’ve felt this way before
So insecure
In the wastelands of today
Where there’s nothing left to lose
And there’s nothing more to take
But you force yourself to choose
In the wastelands of today
Where tomorrow disappears
While the future slips away
And your hope turns into fear
And your hope turns into fear
In the wastelands of today
You say you’re not gonna fight
‘Cause no one would fight for you
And you think there’s not enough love
And no one to give it to
And you’re sure you’ve hurt for so long
You’ve got nothing left to lose
So you say you’re not gonna fight
‘Cause no one would fight for you
You say the weight of the world
Has kept you from letting go
And you think compassion’s a flaw
And you’ll never let it show
And you’re sure you’ve hurt in a way
That no one will ever know
But someday the weight of the world
Will give you the strength to go
Hold on, the weight of the world
Will give you the strength to go
Weep not for roads untraveled
Weep not for paths left alone
‘Cause beyond every bend
Is a long blinding end
It’s the worst kind of pain I’ve known
Give up your heart left broken
And let that mistake pass on
‘Cause the love that you lost
Wasn’t worth what it cost
And in time you’ll be glad it’s gone
Weep not for roads untraveled
Weep not for sights unseen
May your love never end
And if you need a friend
There’s a seat here alongside me
wasted 